“Guilt Shower” & “Bad Catholic”


Guilt Shower1

Heritage
Low
Adoptive High Adoptive Low
its performance stylized popular
 
masculinity extracts humaneness
 
only to demand white normativity
 
the first rule of fight club is you don’t talk
manliness sinks into me like tea leaves
 
con cuidado tomo cada respiro
 
I distract         learn myself with TV
 
en lenguajes extraños
Heritage
High
about toxic rancheras with white friends
 
sing them in your guilt shower wash limpia
 
con humo and pumice stones saca blood
 
reparations required all the men
y con mis botas y cinturón
 
pegué relámpagos y nací con padre
 
hecho en Tilzapotla Mexico
 
que entierren padres nuestros

                    1This quadrant is based on Berry’s Model of Acculturation.

Bad Catholic1

Heritage
Low
Adoptive High Adoptive Low
every rain drops split open
 
a sacrifice to an unknown deity
 
we’ve all prayed to
 
each time we’ve fallen
in this fall              try
 
para entender lo que sintío Newton
 
the pain before it existed
 
en el sublime de la ignorancia
Heritage
High
does it matter if it was Adam’s or Eve’s apple
 
que cayó and told the truth of gravity
 
sure there will be sects of arteries refusing
 
the proofs, las venas gritando herijia
una gota de Lluvia
 
se forma de polvo la inundación de tierra
 
pero Dios te pide que aceptes
 
la agua bendita en tu frente

1The quadrants are based on Berry’s Model of Acculturation.



Manejo

Not Estela, /
pigtails & cadence /
of okay mamá...okay papá /
w/o either parent.


Self Portrait with Rain

But, /
somewhere: dawn and the hum of hollowing /
seeds planted in dry weather, like a sigh /
or shout or song for when the sky /
breaks open and gives out /
something kinder than light.