London, England
I set out this morning to see the work
installed in Kensington Gardens
the human-high sculptures called : non-objects :
the cone curved to a needle that’s chromed like a mirror
exploded is another way of seeing
o is only one shape the mouth makes
another non-object in the pond aimed at the sky
this one polished and hollowed and circular
a satellite-dish cupping the reflected clouds
swerve of a swan splits the dull algae
reflection’s evasive when everything slopes
and shines back in points
but in points is how the eye manages
I set out with his hat knit by his sister
dampening in the drizzle
wash cold : dry flat : Uranian Knitting Company
across the pond another non-object but red
sisterly mimicking the other’s point of sky
and a row of posts across the Serpentine
a bird beaking its wingpit on each o
I set out here and he sets out to Devonshire
his sister brings a bucket to get sick in
since she hasn’t been on a train in fourteen years
tan swirling : wobbly pitch of rung iron
a slosh as the train pulls out of Clapham
to the home of their dying father
o is only an exploded point
approach the rounded non-object and you’re it and in it
crosscut with bands of ground
last night was the first we spent together
in his East Croydon two-up-two-down
wedge of evening : night : dawn : I saw
each one from his bed while he opened me
and : yes : we stopped for tea in the middle of it
sipped from repellent Spode
:: scoop sugar from the far side of the bowl
and mind the brother and sister in blue ::
do you ever know your own barbarism
before sleeping with a gentleman
:: I direct the music for a very old church :: he said
:: and have you ever seen an Elgar twenty pound note ::
:: and my asshole is bunched like a fist
so to hit you in your teeth ::
o is the sound of being taught
before he opened his shirt for me he asked
who were my favorite composers
and when he put on Sibelius No. 2
I could hear my lips smiling off my teeth
those long metallic contours like a body growing a body
:: it’s meant to be a shore growing ice ::
I have never been so tired of being taught
he explained his sister is schizophrenic
and his father dying and :: did you know
Elgar conducted an asylum band
made of orderlies and nurses : not patients ::
how long have I loved only things older than myself
off the train he carries socks beading in his pocket
she carries a cushion stitched with siblings
she plans for their father’s splintering chairs
I write down his name twice
only three days ago I met him and let him tongue
my soft palate
we walked back to my room where
the grunts of Lambeth thumped through the cracked window
and he said he teaches music
names are never as important as type
sonata : fugue : first species : overture
men are florid compared to their types
I will get a phone call saying someone has died
he opens his cheesewhite arms as if to say
:: yes I know many people want to speak of sad things ::
and then does but those are only the shapes
peopling the purple periphery
he will say at another time :: this is the sad part ::
while laughing at the maudlin violin
I make my mouth this way because o is for obvious
the shapes one imagines one imagines one sees
are a matter of decontextualization
so the sex remains pointedly central
a blank sheet and reflexively blank rubbing
:: let me tell you my theory of the Devonshire Woods
a culture is no better than its etc.
we need them to stay dark and wide to put our sisters in it
the dark one with triangular ears and a jelly face
or one old one holding a candle behind her head
whispering a charm to make her husband’s face appear
we need woods for our sisters’ sakes ::
Dorothy Wordsworth lost her hair and then her teeth
but she kept the wedding ring she stole from William
and then her face went jelly and droopy
purple repositories of someone’s strange uncharting
:: but that was Cumbria not Devonshire ::
she once opened her diary just to write :: I forgot ::
Devonshire is stockier : more diphthongs
:: the first night you will be the boy the last night fuck me ::
but that’s too fast and simple when what I want’s exploded
wash cold : dry flat : Copernican Knitting Company
how to treat who won’t be shocked
something is eating its way from behind the fowl’s heart
the soft willing bottom of its pink chest
I’ll show him the Blake memorial
which he never knew existed
prints blown up and glued against the walls of tunnels
in mosaics with red buttons : press them
he’ll show me the hall in Oxford where he performed 4’33”
remembering the puff of catkin that drifted in
and landed on his cheek in the second movement
I see a glint of tinsel from the loon’s beak
I will spend twenty more nights with him
only the glint like Sibelius’s suggestion of tone
meet me on the platform among the hundreds
when fate happens as much as it does to families
dying slowly by the sea barely affording their homes
no : American schools don’t have deer parks
imagining his sister : his dead mother : his dying father
I write down his name twice and watch the non-object
a catkin orbits as if resisting
only a touch of blood like most long weekends
mold me into cups and pour me into cups
no more ruining the right words in the wrong order
we lack the science to press against our orbits
in a moment it will open and you will see yourself
in the poem that spits in your mouth : a hair
she once opened her diary to write :: trouble with my bowels ::
what manners what manners what manners what
he will show me Schoenberg’s Musical Idea
which is incomplete and full of errors
he explains but I propose we only got it wrong
:: The paths of harmony are torturous ::
:: only with the requirements and possibilities of its motive ::
:: The effect of broken chords ::
:: especially in deceptive cadences ::
there was one poet whose intestines crossed
over themselves so he was in continuous pain
a stitch : a stitch in his gut
wash cold : dry flat : Aeolian Knitting Company
euphemism for dying
euphemism for dead
euphemism for insane
another struggle to describe someone’s hands
I remember the lover I left in Colorado
how clean art is bothers me torturously
like the dream of the animal in which there’s no animal
but I wear its hide
he won’t tell me about the dying deer but the eaten deer
how he heard shots coming from the deer park on Christmas Eve
and it wasn’t until spring he realized what he’d eaten
the night was a long fancy and the color of all colors
at the love of the center of the heart is fiction
the other man that I was loving in Colorado
his mother is dying and no one knows this yet
how many faces do you have when absent
like so many poets’ insane sisters
there are spurs of cancer in her stomach and liver
what an education this will be
his mother knit me a hat before I left for England
she asked me my favorite color and I said purple
I’m in a sprawling park carrying two hats
once this park was a woods full of deer
and a king stalked and shot them with arrows
the white one with red eyes was spared
a steaming ornament against the gray
hot with the fear of becoming a poem
but that isn’t this one which is the one
on the eating of her dun sisters
why do we say heart when we mean gut
why the rubied Latin of : anthologize : and : taxonomize :
it’s not a brocade but a self-striping
interval of white zagged into the knit
he used to say :: friend of Dorothy ::
but it’s always brocade
wash cold : dry flat until old and stretched
a knot of brain that snaps one : claps another
a tuning fork that hums big enough to hum a house
I want to say I will be out of myself
but I will never be more myself
hurting a man and hurting him from behind
one of us dangling off the other
one of us lifted above the other
like John celestialized over the cross
a man becoming moon or mounting the stairs
and I want to say that I’ll reach in and touch a family
but it’s a tricky distance : future tense
since I am in the park with famous non-objects
and he is in Devonshire with his schizophrenic sister
and in Aurora a man younger than him but older than me
gives the mother milky medicine
purply words like lineage or inheritance
as if it comes from something other
than the x’s in the backs of our eyes
where spurs of dying hide and spurs of :
but how the brain connects to the eye
resembles how the gut opens to the world
palm against a shattering glass
though no fingerprints on art
sweet mystery of where the center of the body is
and the education in finding it
rediscovering its starry opening unskeined
a million shapes squiggle away purply
to hide in the head of the center
brainy splatter : but my ears are cold
I leave both hats on the bench
under the parsimonious drizzle
which moves through my body’s closing o